Before getting into my actual thoughts on my goal song, a general thought about playlists. We didn’t invent the wheel on this and I’m pretty sure this is a staple of most family road trips, but our upcoming road trip will be our first attempt at each member of the family picking ten songs and us throwing them on shuffle. Forty songs running the gambit from vocaloids to K-pop to 90s sad bastard music to whatever I will inflict upon my family. It will be the first attempt at a vacation soundtrack and I’m excited.

Now back to the task at hand. As someone who grew up playing hockey the idea of having a goal song seems incredibly cool. I’d love to see all teams adopt the idea of personalized goal songs in the NHL, but the idea of team over individual will forever hold hockey back from being as fun as it could be. (Refocuses and remembers this isn’t a hockey blog.)

So anyway, a song… a song that says I won, I’m the best, I beat you, and I’m happy. That’s what we are going for but not in a generic Jock Jams sense, instead a personalized take on it. It’s time to stew on that.

[Hops in the shower to clear head and dwell on what song that could be.]

It was a good shower. Clarity achieved, an answer reached. And while not the answer, I appreciated that Regina Spektor’s Us would be a solid response assuming it was only used when taking the lead. “They’ll build a statue of us” doesn’t hit as hard if you are down 5-2.

That led me to a specific genre of boastful, pump up music, and my first seriously considered option of You Know My Steez by Gang Starr. As a goofy kid from the suburbs, I’m not sure it fully captures my persona, but it’s a great song.

We’ll move on to the decision of what works better for me, and that is Busta Rhymes. Busta Rhymes feels like walking a fine line here because Fire it Up/Turn it Up did appear on a Jock Jams compilation. And while that song is nails, it’s not one that I was considering. I gave serious consideration to Dangerous, and it came down to a mental coin flip between that and the ultimate goal song option: Woo-hah! Got you all in check.

I could have just as easily included Gimme Some Mo’ or about half a dozen other Busta Rhymes songs as well given his Jock Jam tendencies, but this one seems to hit the mark on a personal and goal song level.

All of this lends itself well to a goal song (and presumably it would need to be cut off before any weed smoking lyrics):

“When I step up in the place, ayo, I step correct
Woo-hah! Got you all in check (ha, ha!)
I got that head-nod shit that make you break your neck
Woo-hah! I got you all in check (ha, ha, ha!)
And you know we come through to wreck the discotheque
Woo-hah! I got you all in check
Throw your hands up in the air, don’t ever disrespect
Woo-hah! ‘Cause I got you all in check“

The Maple Leafs have already cancelled one goal song over questionable lyrics, I’m sure this would never actually fly. Luckily for me there was never any danger of me playing in the NHL, so it gets my approval.